


If

by Sammynator



Series: 30 Days OTP Alphabet Challenge [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon Temporary Character Death, Grief/Mourning, M/M, POV Sam Winchester, Post-Episode: s09e23 Do You Believe In Miracles?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 14:27:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18075146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammynator/pseuds/Sammynator
Summary: After the fight with Metatron, Sam has to take Dean home. Guilt and anguish torment him with thoughts as dark and relentless as the night surrounding him.





	If

**Author's Note:**

> Part nine of the OTP Alphabet Challenge

If. If is the worst word in existance. If means, there could have been another way, there could have been another outcome, but somehow I didn´t make it there. If I had been a little bit faster, I could have stopped Metatron. If I had been more careful, Dean wouldn´t have knocked me out so easily. If I had watched him. If I hadn´t said all these words I didn´t mean, just because my damn feelings were hurt. If I just had finished these trials or simply died afterwards, we wouldn´t be in this mess. And the worst part about that word is, that it doesn´t change a godforsaken thing. No amount of loathing, wishful thinking, no amount of love, hate or grief can heal my brother, will make his heart continue beating, will make his breath flow in and out of his chest, will make him open his eyes and make fun of me because mine are red-rimmed and puffy because I spent the way home crying my heart out beside his dead body. No amount of "if" can bring Dean back from the dead, but something, or someone, else will. If…


End file.
